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We took a little trip this weekend to B&N after not having been for months. I was hoping to find one of the diet cookbooks on my Amazon wishlist- the Hungry Girl one (love that site, btw.) It was m.i.a. But there was one lonely copy of another cookbook on my list, Devin Alexander’s “The Most Decadent Diet Ever.” It’s worth noting that I do not like the word decadent. It’s like scrumptious. Let’s just agree to tasty and good and yummy, and leave those over the top adjectives where they belong, in 1890. That goes for you too, succulent. Go on…shoo. So I snatched it up, but not before all the cushy armchairs in the section were filled. Time to go.

I can’t ride and read well, so I had to wait until home to really dig in. But ever since, I have been glued. Yes, diet food conjures up images of bland bunny chow, cardboard and water. But this book might make you wonder why that ever was. Because let’s face it- Parmesan crusted fries and juicy barbecue burgers are not mainstays of most diet cookbooks. And it’s nice to see that those old standbys of crap eating can be remade into something a little (sometimes a lot) healthier. So I have been planning which recipe to start with all weekend. The Honey-Glazed Spiced Pork Tenderloin almost won, but Brian nixed it (we’re not pork fans, but that recipe looks soooo good. One day, we’re gonna have that for dinner, whether he likes it or not.) So I went with another honey recipe, the Honey-Lime Marinated London Broil. Only Brian couldn’t find a London Broil/top round, so eye of round it was. I don’t know a lot about cuts of meat, so I assume eye of round is fattier. And slightly cheaper. Anywhoo. The recipe is super easy, and the marinade and meat can all be put together the night before (marinade time is at least 6 hours.) I think they intend for you to eat it more the way you’d eat old fashioned roast beef, but we like to live a little. So fajitas it was. Try it now! It’s easy, tasty, and you have no excuse to not try out easy and tasty.

½ cup fresh lime juice

2 TBSP extra virgin olive oil

1 TBSP plus 1 tsp honey

2 TBSP fresh minced garlic

1 tsp salt

1¼ pounds trimmed London Broil (top round steak)

Whisk lime juice, olive oil and honey in small bowl. Stir in garlic and salt. Place steak in resealable plastic bag. Pour in marinade, seal bag and rotate it so that steak is covered with marinade. Place in refrigerator and marinade 6 hours or overnight, rotating occasionally, if possible.

Preheat grill to high.

Remove steak from marinade and place on grill (discard marinade.) Grill 4-6 minutes per side for medium rare, or to desired doneness. Place on plate or cutting board and cover with foil; let sit ten minutes before slicing. Slice immediately before serving, or refrigerate uncut steak and slice just before serving.

(I served mine on low carb whole wheat 8” flour tortillas with chopped tomato and black olive mix, lettuce and Monterey Jack. Would also be great on a salad.)

The internet is a great facilitator to my obsessive whims. I’ll remember a doll from the 80’s that I really wanted but never had (say, Rose Petal Place), and off I go, looking for whatever I can find. Three hours later, I’ll have found pages dedicated to that entire doll series, and all things RPP that were unreleased, plus fan pages for Charmkins, Strawberry Shortcake and My Little Pony. Then off to ebay to window shop for all these things I never had. It sounds sad but it’s really not. And one day, I will have the money and shelf space for that Charmkins collection I’ve been planning since 1986.

Something I have been looking for since about 2002 is this set of Pyrex (I assume Pyrex) mixing bowls with a little fruit design on one side. My aunt Nini got them one Easter, and I thought they were the cutest bowls ever. Just clear glass bowls with simple, vibrant fruits done in near Marimekko style.
They reminded me of these shirts I wore when I was younger, they were white with allover prints of tiny hearts or stars in primary colors. I think they came from Tarjay. Anywhoo, no one in my family seems to recall these bowls. And I couldn’t tell you if my aunt still has them, because she moves a lot, and they could frankly be anywhere. And, as I was about 10 when she bought them, I wouldn’t have thought to ask the pattern name. I thought you just bought based on the picture on the box, names were not any part of that. Live and learn, I suppose.

So, I’m on a mission to find them. When I moved out for about the third time, I told my mom I wanted to do my kitchen in fruits. She bought me some apple dishes that while cute, were more down on the farm and less modern-cartoony than I liked. I spent a good chunk of the afternoon googling every word and word combo that I thought would give me the results I desire. No luck so far. But I did fall upon a site and Flickr group that I’m sure will give me hours of enjoyment- and lead me down the rabbit hole of collection. Crazy Daisy is a pattern that I grew up with. My mom still has a few pieces if I’m not mistaken. It’s fun to see all the patterns through the years and find some that I could see in my kitchen, sharing counter space with a certain set of fruity mixing bowls. If only I could find the darn things. So check out the site http://www.pyrexlove.com/ and peruse all bowls and casseroles that your grandma might have made tuna surprise in. And be thankful that tuna surprise wasn’t one of your mom’s favorites. Yecch.

Since I have too much free time, I’ve decided to delve into some of the more pervasive commercials of this time. Issue one- the Glade lady. She started out innocently enough- throwing a gathering for a few girlfriends, it’s during the holidays, she has a gorgeous house, the perfect LBD, it’s the picture of early 90’s Chris Columbus perfection. But there’s something missing…maybe the dog rolled in mess outside and tracked it in. Maybe hubby is slacking on garbage duty, and they had flounder for last night’s dinner. Or maybe she’s a real estate stager, and is all out of cookie spray. Whatever. Enter Glade candles. But what lurks beneath the slightly quirky surface of our domestic doyenne is far more sinister than a love of over the fence gossip.

She lights the candle. The doorbell rings. This candle isn’t Diptyque! Hell, it isn’t even one of those White Barn Candle Co. candles from B&BW. It’s Glade…from the cleaning supplies aisle in Wall Banger’s. Its closest neighbors are those 98 cent jelly cones and Toilet Duck. This will not do, even though the scent makes everyone want pie. So, off goes the label, into the trash (or so we thought.) Door is answered, greetings all around, “is that pie?” No! It’s a candle…from France. What’s fancier than candles from France? Nothing, and don’t you forget it. Oh you mean Glahday?? Hens cackle, candle is described, candle lady finally admits that yes, the candle is Glade, end scene.

So. What can we tell about our heroine from this ad? And from all subsequent ads? That she’s got caviar taste and a catfish budget? That perhaps there is little to suburban fulfillment beyond having all the right things? Yeah, that’s what Glade wants you to think. What I think is that she’s got sociopathic tendencies and is a compulsive habitual liar. Why else would she lie about being at the spa while soaking in her own tub? Or lie about cleaning all day after a few spritzes of a new Febreze-like product? Because deep down, she is the new girl in 7^th grade, with a bad perm and buck teeth, and all the wrong clothes. And the only thing in this world that will keep the queen bees of this world off the gawky outsiders is flashing the “right” item before they hit. Thank you, Glade. Ok, so it’s not as serious as all that. Sometimes, a candle is just a candle. Unless it’s from France Please join me next week, when we discuss the deeper meaning of improv in a drive-in.

So my dreams of being a good little vegetarian haven’t been totally squashed. We’ve actually had a few meatless meals since I gave up (mostly stir fry, but we do a lot of that anyway, so no big whoop.) I have noticed now that even going a few days in a row without meat, if I happen to eat a little bit of it, one of two things occur- either heartburn with a side of reflux, or some wicked stomach upset. We had Popeye’s last night, and I have been paying for it ever since. Let’s just say, my stomach wrote a check my butt couldn’t cash. Or colon, whatever. And tonight was Taco Bell (b/c Brian and I had a little spat, and dinner was served around 11:30p.) I’m still paying for both of those meals.

I am currently looking for new ways to do beans and rice. The dish from my childhood consisted of red beans, sausage, a box of Zatarain’s mix, and white rice. We had it often (and just a lot of rice in general, which is why I haven’t eaten rice in about 10 years. I got tired of it so I quit it ), and I never really cared for it, unless my mom made her from scratch cornbread. She doesn’t cook often, but she sure as hell puts her big toe into some corn bread and biscuits. Canned creamed corn she burns, but baked goods she can do. I had some chickpeas and saffron rice once when my aunt was married to my Uncle Ray (who is Dominican), and I really liked it. Sooo, I’m planning to redo old school red beans and rice by making a chickpea stew, and serving it over yellow rice. So far, my plan includes using a can of tomato basil soup, some balsamic vinegar and a few other spices (and a red bell pepper), and serving it over the rice. If I could make it like a paella, I think it would please me greatly. I’ve never had it, but it looks really good. So I will post my recipe for chickpea stew and saffron rice once I have made it

Also, I’m enjoying a couple of vegetarian/vegan cookbooks right now. One, “Vegan With a Vengeance” by Isa Chandra Moskowit, has a plethora of creative recipes with clever, punk-inspired titles (and I love the tips from the author’s cat.) The Fauxstess and lemon cupcakes will be given a spin in my kitchen fo sho. My favorite vegetarian cookbook ever of all time and forever is now officially “Vegetarian Cooking for Everyone” by Deborah Madison. I never knew that making a simple tomato sauce for pasta, from real live tomatoes, could be so easy. When she says it’s for everyone, she’s ain’t fibbing- the recipes are so simple, yet most of them have made my mouth water (the way she describes celery makes me want to snack on some, even though I detest it and always have.) It’s a big book, too, and it reads like a foodie novel. It’s awesome I think anyone, even die hard carnivores, would be hard pressed to not find something in that book that they would enjoy. And I’m not even into the desserts chapter yet!

So maybe I’m starting to view my original goal as less of a one month challenge to continuity, and more of a lifelong evolutionary process. So perhaps I haven’t really given up as much as I’ve just begun to fight

Ok, so I’m throwing in the towel. After much thought on the matter, I have decided that I’m not doing well with this because the time isn’t right. I have a really weird attitude towards vegetables and fruits now (which is odd, b/c I love fruit so.) Sunday night, I plowed through an entire bag of grapes, after initially not wanting them at all, because I had it in mind that “grapes are gross.” I like grapes, I have never not liked them, so it confuzzles me. Anyway, here is the food log from Friday- Monday:

Friday:

• Cereal w/ organic 2% milk, orange
• Either veggie corndogs or more cereal (hey I’ve slept since then..)
• Homemade focaccia with pesto, sun dried tomatoes, black olives and a bit of mozzarella- little pizzas

Saturday:

• Cereal and 2%
• 2 oranges
• #6 Baja Chicken from Taco DingDong. Yup, back to that…
• ricotta

Sunday:

• 2 orders of cheese sticks from Sonic (I really like cheese, recall)
• Popcorn chicken meal from Sonic. I paid dearly for that later, with some wicked heartburn and acid reflux. I did not miss that.
• Bag of green seedless grapes

Monday:

• Orange
• Hebrew National hotdogs (2) and chili, cheese, yellow mustard, Sunchips, Neapolitan sundae

So I am not doing great, but I did at least try a few new things. And I am happy to report that that will continue- I’m still perusing, marking recipes for vegetarian meals and snacks. I’m just not in the best frame of mood to totally commit currently, but with more planning, I think that in a few months, I may try again. Or I may find some other way to tailor it to my specific needs and personality. I’m not ruling it out There are always options! And I’m glad I tried at least.

I finally made eggplant parmesan subs. I wanted to like them so much, but I didn’t I tried a slice of the eggplant after they were all fried and still hot, and it had no real flavor. Brian liked it, said it tasted like fried zucchini. I’ve never had zucchini before, either, so couldn’t compare. I tried it again after the sandwiches were assembled- still not liking it. So it’s possible that eggplant is just another on the list of “foods my dad and I dislike.” Like liver and mayonnaise. At least he passed along his love of fresh fruit

The rest of the day was still meat free, and I’m still not really craving any. Breakfast was some Kangaroo brand pita chips and two veggie corndogs (well, more brunch than breakfast.) I had some strawberries mid-afternoon, and instead of the planned dinner, I had leftover bean nachos. My friend, Diana, just told me to try eggplant in a restaurant, so maybe one day I will. But for now, my eggplant days are on hiatus.
I’m sending the leftovers to work with Brian, and he can ask if anyone there likes eggplant. I think I’ll be relieved if they say “it usually tastes much better than this!” (Brian actually liked it, so not sure what to expect really.) And if they like it, then it just means that I don’t, and it’s ok. At least I tried something new!

Things are getting better, slowly but surely. I’m not really craving meat currently, so that’s a plus. Here’s what’s gone down for the last three days:

Day 11-

• Handful of cherry tomatoes and saltine crackers (we needed groceries)
• More saltine crackers for lunch (I think…)
• Taco Bell- 2 bean burritos and a triple layer nacho (meat free! and only 79 cents!)

Day 12-

• Bolthouse Farms berry smoothie, after some much needed grocery shopping
• Captain D’s- fish!!! I had to pick Brian up at lunch, and instead of being responsible and making lunch at home, we went out, and they were the least crowded (and I hate to say the lesser of all evils, but eh)
• Steamed broccoli teriyaki with water chestnuts, sesame seeds, Simply Asia brand sesame teriyaki noodles, and chow mein noodles. I made a sauce for the veggies, and Brian actually commented that he “really liked” the sauce, and I should definitely make it again He rarely says anything more than “it’s ok/alright” about most of my cooking, so that made me really happy. Plus, he’s not a huge fan of broccoli, so score.

Day 13-

• Lemon yogurt and an orange with a glass of pomegranate lemonade. Love the lemonade.
• Yakisoba brand stir fry noodles. It’s seriously ramen for grown-ups. So easy, so good. Next time I make stir fry, I will serve it atop a bed of these noodles. They are on my buy again list.
• Bean burritos/nachos with pico de gallo, black olives and nacho cheese. I just stirred it all together, baked it for 20 minutes, and served it with tortilla chips and whole wheat tortillas. I like the ww tortillas. They’re kinda sweet, so it adds an interesting flavor to the burritos.
• Sonic sundae with hot fudge, caramel and nuts. I needed ice cream.

I like that I can now see a Popeye’s commercial and not automatically go “mmmmm, chicken…” I feel it’s silly to say it’s getting easier (especially after having fish), but I am feeling so much better about the whole thing. On the menu for tomorrow (hopefully!)- eggplant parmesan subs and mini focaccia pizzas. They will make good little snacks for the next few days, because I still have some olives, and I found my favorite pesto (love) and some sun dried tomatoes. I just hope that I like the eggplant, and that I remember to take pictures. Oh, and I think I have lost 3 pounds. Our scale usually shows me fluctuating between one and seven pounds, but I weighed Monday and Tuesday, and the scale was showing roughly the same number. So yay for that!

Today was pizza. Only pizza. No wait, there were some saltine crackers in there way earlier, but for the most part, just black olive and pepperoni ( boooo, me) pizza. On the slate for tomorrow- grocery shopping, and my resolve to not only keep with it (well, start over and keep with it), but also to do better. My vegan kit from Peta came in Saturday, it’s basically a little booklet that gives celebrity accounts of why they’re vegetarians/vegans (Clint Eastwood, a vegan…who knew?), and details on meat industry brutality, and a few recipes. Reading about others’ experiences always seems to strengthen my resolve, so another goal I have is to read a little something about it everyday, as it may help. So here we go again! And hopefully a lot better this time.

The last two days have been a regular meat fest for me. Here goes:

Day 8

• Breakfast- don’t recall. I think it was probably soda
• Lunch- was actually dinner, because I get up really late. I was tempted to order an eggplant parm sub from Monjuni’s (in Ruston, La, and they have a few veggie-friendly dishes. I was just not in the mood for pasta.) Since I’m a weenie, I got the chicken parm sub. And breadsticks. And parmesan covered fries (those were sooo good.) I left the lettuce on my sandwich, something I never do, so woo for vegetables… I’m a riot.
• Dessert- Fried ice cream blast from Sonic. A regular sized one, so I don’t feel like a total pig. It was nice and cinnamon-y.

Day 9

• Brunch- Here’s where things went completely bust. I had a Sonic cheeseburger. For some reason, beef is a bigger no-no than chicken in my mind (like it’s not all dead animal?), so that has me feeling really guilty.
• Dinner- A number 6, Baja chicken from Taco Bell. I could have done so much better, but I figured I’d already slipped so far, that it didn’t matter. Yup, I am really terrible at this.

So, I have decided to finish my weekend of crap eating, and regroup, and do better. I’m even thinking of adding extra time to this, for the days I have screwed up. And, based on the advice of some of my fellow mark reps, I’m going to make my own eggplant parm. I can tell that meat makes me sluggish, even after not eating it for several days, then eating it again. I have to do better, and I will Time to make a grocery list!

I had hoped things would be going swell in this little venture by now- I’d be enjoying meatless breakfasts, lunch on brussels sprouts, snack on carrots…Not happening. Tonight, I really wanted a certain sandwich I mentioned previously. Not just one, but two. So, today’s food log:

• Breakfast- Cold pizza, meat picked off (1 piece), water
• Lunch- Diet Dr. Pepper. I had crazy heartburn, and didn’t want to eat, so I soda’d it up and took an antacid with a glass of water
• Dinner- Two Chicken With No Name sandwiches (with lettuce at least, I never do lettuce on a sandwich.) One could perhaps argue it was just one large sandwich, since they come on one folded pita round, but eh. It was two. And they were mind bogglingly delicious
• Dessert- Soy milk/ice cream shake. And now I feel so sick. It was good, and my first one this week (taking a break from soy every few days), so not having another until…who knows.

So, I am really struggling with my decision. It’s definitely easier for me to make meaty meals, or to just grab a burger or some chicken while out. I knew this would be difficult, but whoa, it’s starting to feel insurmountable. But progress, not perfection I suppose. I keep wondering if I’ll keep it up after August, or if I’ll even make it to the end. I do think that eating more fruits and vegetables (as previously mentioned) will be a good end product of this, and instead of beating myself up over supposed failure, I’ll just be glad that I tried my best and learned some new things. And I hope I do so much better tomorrow